So I was doing a little Internet surfing today; the headline, How to Divorce-Proof Your Marriage popped up, and of course, I clicked on it. Ann Bauer’s article, Have Sex With Your Spouse, highlighted something we probably all suspected but wouldn’t want to admit—having sex often helps your marriage last. I had to wonder though--is that true? Should we be trying to have as much sex as possible with our spouse? How much is enough?
Then I read an article by Emily, “THAT LADY WHO HAS SEX WITH HER HUSBAND EVERY DAY MAKES ME FEEL BAD.” Basically, Emily laments how both American Idol and new parenthood have put the kibosh on her sexual life with her husband. But another factor in Emily’s life seems to be her own experience with monogamous sex. She writes:
“Good sex, to me, is something filthy and taboo that you do with a thrilling stranger. Relationship sex, at a certain point, becomes a simple act of maintenance, like scrubbing your shower curtain to prevent mold build-up. It doesn't get me high in the same way, but it's a fair trade-off for true intimacy, like how you get big boobs or perky ones but not usually both. That's just the way it is, I tell myself.”
So this puts a second question on the table—does married sex have to be vanilla sex? Or shower curtain cleaning? Can you still fuck the same man every day and enjoy it? Or do you just need to enjoy it in a different way?
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments. I, for one, think you can, and I’m looking forward to giving it a try…as soon as Mr. Sometimes gets home from work.
Love & Hugs, June
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